This past week, our kids have been on a role. Maybe I should clarify---the twins have been on a role. Luke has been his little sweet self for the most part and his big news is that he is finally taking steps!
Anyway, three-year olds are so stinking funny, but I have literally wanted to CRAWL IN A HOLE at least 5 x this week. I decided to write this tonight because I thought it would be therapeutic. The kids have been rather challenging lately and these stories just make me laugh thinking about them. Every word of these are true. I promise. And, just so you know, it HAS been therapeutic writing them. I love our boys...they are a mess, but they will never be three again. We must enjoy this time....to the fullest.
Story #1: Prego???
Matthew: (to a family friend who is over that we haven't seen in a while): Are YOU having a baby?
Family friend: Laughs...no, honey, I'm not having a baby. My babies are all raised and not babies anymore.
Matthew: But, you have a baby in your tummy.
Family friend: Oh, no that's not a baby sweetheart.
Matthew: Maybe your baby's name can be Luke, too.
Mommy: (speechless)
Story #2: Man or Woman?
I am with the three boys and we are in McDonalds after getting our food and sitting in a booth together:
Matthew: Mommy look at that man eating a BIG hamburger. (I turn to look and see a sweet little postal worker LADY sitting behind us eating a hamburger and my face starts to turn red...here we go!)
Mommy: Matthew, that is a sweet LADY eating a burger just like you have. Can you say hello?
Matthew: Hello.
Nice lady: Hi sweetheart. How are you?
Matthew: I am good. Mommy that man is talking to me now and HE is eating a BIG burger and HUGE french fries.
Mommy: Matthew SHEEEE is eating her lunch. Let's not disturb her, okay.
At this point, Matthew would not stop talking about this poor lady's food quantity and calling her a man and for those of you who know him, he talks soooo loud. So, I totally did some bribery and asked him to use his quiet voice and maybe we would get some ice cream soon. Don't judge me...I had to do it!
Story #3: Peeing in a cup....
We are the doctor's office for Luke's appointment. First of all, this is the first time I have ever had to bring all 3 kids to the doctor together by myself. Even though Luke was the only one with the appointment, it will still crazy. I will never do it again! I don't know what I was thinking. We are all sitting in the patient room waiting on the doctor (well, I am sitting and Matthew and Caleb are jumping off the bench in the room and Luke is screaming because he has an ear infection). We have already made a scene at this point because for Matthew's 3 year check up he got to pee in a cup and he really wanted to do that this time. So, when we went back to the bathroom, he threw the biggest tantrum when he didn't have a cup to pee in and kept asking the nurses if he could have a turn peeing in the cup. At this point, I am already flustered. Anyway, our nice, middle-aged doctor walks in and the first thing Matthew says is, "Mommy, that's silly. Our doctor doesn't have any hair. He is bald just like our Papa."
Mommy: Matthew, he has a LOT more hair than our Papa. He isn't bald, silly.
Matthew: Mommy, he doesn't have any hair. It must have flew away.
Mommy: Okay, Matthew, thank you.
Thankfully, we have a great relationship with our doctor and he just laughed but I could have died sitting there. Why do these things always happen to me and not Tim?!
Story #4: The Dreaded Public Bathroom Stall (Emily with Matthew and Caleb waiting in line for a stall with several other women..):
Matthew: Mommy, do all these people need to go poo-poo?
Caleb: No, Matchew (this is how he pronounces it), they have to go PEE-PEE and POO-POO.
Matthew (to the lady next to us): Maybe if you can go poo-poo in the potty you will get a m&m...
Caleb: Mommy tells us we can't go poo-poo on Buzz Light Year (who is on their underwear...I am desperate at this point so I've been telling them Buzz will be so sad if they potty on him!) or we won't get our m&ms...
Mommy: Speechless, again....
